Little poem, deep feelings

Sometimes I wish I could disappear,

escape from myself,

keep me away from the rest.

Sometimes I wonder,

how hard do I really try?

Why do I lie, why do I cheat and hide?

Sometimes I think I can,

but then I fall over again

and realize that sometimes I'm strong,

but most of the times convienently weak.

Now I have opened my eyes,

and I can see the footprints behind me,

footprints on a shiny rough path

that I've been walking confidently.

Now I have opened my eyes

and all I can see is the unknown.

Unknown is unconfortable

unknown is scary.

I'm scared.

Scared of the path in front of my eyes,

fear of it being as rough as it has been.

Because I'd chosen a shiny and rough path

which leads me to nothing.

And now I have to choose

between keeping myself loosing or

risking to win.

I'm sick of nothing, sick of everything.

Sick of having to, sick of quitting.

Sick of emptyness, sick of the rest.

Now it's time to walk.

To walk this uncertain way,

to an uncertain land.

But hush, dear, hush. You've got yourself awake.

Even though it's not a good help,
even tough you're your worst enemy:
You're the only thing you've really got.

Now I'm mostly awake

and now I can see that there's only one way to go.

That unfortunately I was mistaken,

that the only way there is

is the way the others do,

and that I don't want to walk on it.

That I've learned to err,

that I need more than a hand,

but most of all, that I need to really want to.

That I need to really lose it all, to really want to fight for me.

 
 
 
(Espero q entiendan inglés :/ me salió así, sé q algunas palabras no están bien, pero bueno, a veces me da por pensar en otro idioma xq coo q el español no se presta xD)